We've been trawling paths these past few days. Paths of Vikings, Christians, Romans, iron age folk. It's been amazing. He was like me years back when my older two were his older twos age. Everything was a lesson. I sat back and enjoyed and watched and let them go. We think we teach by talking. We… Continue reading Paths
I fall into holes with him every few years bent backwards, doubled over never faces meeting but minds perhaps
I noticed something today. As I cleared the second to last thing on my list off the table; three tiny shells right there, next to my laptop. Auger shells, pink and pale, the tips lost in a storm perhaps, or just from breaking on the beach. I picked them up in my hand and my… Continue reading I’m sorry
is not my firstborn, he is my ultimate. He is the point of every miscarriage, every failed test, every drunken shag, every sober shag, every kiss, every ounce of love, every thought for 8 years, every ovulation pain, every pain at the absence of ovulation, every wish I wasn't drunk, every cause for being drunk,… Continue reading He
can't sleep, won't sleep won't go back to bed too wired too tired too fucked in the head too much not enough writing shit instead big dreams burst seams dead
I reckon I'm still not doing enough but fuck me I'm tired. Tired and with a mind racing like a snake. And this is just another form of procrastination, another way to stop doing the actual things that would probably help me sleep other than having a wank, again. I just watched some porn. She… Continue reading Never enough
Firstly, if you've come here thinking that this is some nice parenting blog where I tell you how amazing my life/kids/partner/family is, you've come to the wrong place. This blog is for me to spout my anger and frustration and where I can get quite properly riled up about all the crap that comes along with being a mother, a step-mother, a partner and an ex (and probably politics to be honest).